I’ve been on GrapheneOS for 4 years or so. I’ve tried CalyxOS every now and then, but always end up coming back to GrapheneOS. I find it simple, private, secure and free of BS. CalyxOS does come with some stuff preinstalled, which doesn’t really appeal to me, and I trust the sandboxes Google Play model much more that MicroG.
About the devs, I really haven’t had any issues that I have not been able to resolve myself, so my interaction with the is non-existing. I have read some posts with interactions with them, and they do seem to be hostile towards anything that is not 100% aligned with their train of thought, which I find stupid, to say the least. But regardless of how rude they may be, I feel GOS literally has no competition in the Android landscape in terms of privacy and security.
I’ve been on GrapheneOS for almost 4 years now, absolutely no regrets, even on my mental health.