So what would you do if you ordered a nuclear strike on a foreign country and then you flew your private extortion jet liner to get to your bunker, you run out of the plane…there’s not much time left they tell you. So you keep running into the bunker and you tell the guard thank you for your sacrifice. He starts closing the door from outside for you. You keep running down the stairs and then you hear several hundred farts go off. Can’t pay attention but reach bottom of bunker. You hear the door final close after the farts. You reach the bottom to find an empty concrete room, epoxy coating finish. At the center there is a table and on it half a milkyway chocolate bar. You hear all sorts of banging. Then silence.
Hours later your sort of hungry so you eat the milkyway. Pretty good you think to yourself, considering the destruction you just unleashed. That’s until a few minutes later when you realize you got the runs! You can’t go opening the door! There’s fall out outside! So you poop in the corner. You also gotta pee! Fine just pee on the wall. But the floor is super level so it just spreads out along. Mixing with poo, the smell is mild, almost tolerable now.
Fine! You tell yourself… I must open the first door and knock on the outside just to see if anyone is still alive. I’m kind of hungry actually… Open the stairs door…pew! It stinks like a god would smell wet and smeared in rotten eggs. Dam! Now the entire place smells of fart! You must escape! Get fresh air and food! Fall out won’t be here for another 30 minutes! You can make it! Run! Fucker! Run! Pant a little your fat ass! Run! Shit, these stair are steep! Finally the vault door! Turn it! Except you can’t… They’ve locked you in there! LOL
Everyone is in on it. Everyone watched you eat the rancid milkyway! Everyone saw you waddling on your own poop. They saw your face when you got the farts. Yes! It was us all along! Now festivities! Or maybe we’re all dead. Give up for now. You’ll get stronger tomorrow and maybe, just maybe you’ll be able to open the door and get pizza.
What wonderful news!
So what would you do if you ordered a nuclear strike on a foreign country and then you flew your private extortion jet liner to get to your bunker, you run out of the plane…there’s not much time left they tell you. So you keep running into the bunker and you tell the guard thank you for your sacrifice. He starts closing the door from outside for you. You keep running down the stairs and then you hear several hundred farts go off. Can’t pay attention but reach bottom of bunker. You hear the door final close after the farts. You reach the bottom to find an empty concrete room, epoxy coating finish. At the center there is a table and on it half a milkyway chocolate bar. You hear all sorts of banging. Then silence.
Hours later your sort of hungry so you eat the milkyway. Pretty good you think to yourself, considering the destruction you just unleashed. That’s until a few minutes later when you realize you got the runs! You can’t go opening the door! There’s fall out outside! So you poop in the corner. You also gotta pee! Fine just pee on the wall. But the floor is super level so it just spreads out along. Mixing with poo, the smell is mild, almost tolerable now.
Fine! You tell yourself… I must open the first door and knock on the outside just to see if anyone is still alive. I’m kind of hungry actually… Open the stairs door…pew! It stinks like a god would smell wet and smeared in rotten eggs. Dam! Now the entire place smells of fart! You must escape! Get fresh air and food! Fall out won’t be here for another 30 minutes! You can make it! Run! Fucker! Run! Pant a little your fat ass! Run! Shit, these stair are steep! Finally the vault door! Turn it! Except you can’t… They’ve locked you in there! LOL
Everyone is in on it. Everyone watched you eat the rancid milkyway! Everyone saw you waddling on your own poop. They saw your face when you got the farts. Yes! It was us all along! Now festivities! Or maybe we’re all dead. Give up for now. You’ll get stronger tomorrow and maybe, just maybe you’ll be able to open the door and get pizza.